Family...

Christmas day 2015 has come and gone. It's midnight now here in Oceanside, CA and I'm sitting in the living room of the beach house our family rented for our reunion, watching and listening to the waves of the ocean. There's something soothing about watching and listening to the ocean waves. It helps me reflect on my thoughts from the day.

And so tonight..I'm reflecting on the "Family". It's such a broad subject but here's what I've been reflecting on during the holiday season where you spend a lot of time with family. So as much as I love starting new traditions during the holiday season, I'm realizing that I want my girls to have a solid understanding of what family is. Here are some of my reflections. Please note these are not observations of what is occurring in my family. 

1. God orchestrated the family you are in. I know that sometimes it's not all hunky dorey  amongst ALL family members ALL the time (and if it is, I'd love to know how your family does it!). Hurt feelings, opinions, criticisms, pessimism, judgements, drama, the list could go on and on about all the negative things that occur within a family unit. And this all happens because we're all human and it's just plain hard to always "get along" and be "peaceful". BUT...family is family and sometimes I just wish that the "truth" can be spoken in love and received with love so that we can live life together as a family that builds each other up and not puts each other down. 

2. Expectations in a family can sometimes be helpful but also hurtful. Sometimes, it's great to have expectations or some people might say "hopes" for people in the family because you want the best for them or for them to reach their highest potential. But sometimes, these expectations can end up being hurtful when the person in the family doesn't live up to the expectations. I hope that instead of having expectations, we have a heart of grace and mercy for others in the family, building each other up with encouragement. 

3. Give thanks for the people in your Family. I am very thankful for my family (this includes my own family, my immediate family, extended family, inlaw family, and extended inlaw family). I know that we are all not perfect human beings but these are the people who will always be a part of your life (whether you haven't spoken to them in awhile or seen them). Family is FAMILY...period. It is a blessing to be part of family. 

4. My hopes for my own 2 girls and their understanding of what family is. This list is a work in progress but this is what I desire for my girls as of now... 

• Instead of judgement and criticism, we extend grace to each other in any circumstance,
• We give thanks for each other.
• Family is your earthly foundation that God placed in your life. Appreciate the people in your family and love them.
• Speak truth to each other in love and mercy and receive the words with love.
• Family will always be there for you. Cheering you on, listening to you, and loving you.
• We build each other up with words of blessing and encouragement.

And so as the holiday season is winding down soon, I hope that you have had time to spend time with your family and enjoying each moment. Thanks for reading!

Thoughts on being a SAHM

I really can't believe 2015 is almost over. I feel like as I get older, time seems to fly by even faster. It's late at night, the house is quiet and  I'm sitting here reflecting on this past year. A lot has changed and sometimes I am in disbelief at how much has changed. The biggest change this year was taking a leave from my teaching job to be a SAHM (Stay at home mom). Say what?! Who would have thought I would leave teaching (which I really do love!) to stay at home with my 2 little girls? I distinctly remember telling my friends that I would NEVER be a SAHM because I didn't think I would have it in me to be one nor would I like it. Well....let's just say that was 10 years ago and waaay before I had kids. So, now it's been 6 months since I left teaching to be a SAHM. So this begs the question: what do I think about this new gig of being a SAHM?

Here are a few things that I love and things I struggle with as a SAHM. I'll start with the things I love first (always start with the positive!)

1) I love being able to spend time with my girls. Even though I love routines and schedules, there are days where we just lounge around at home and just play or do a random outing to a park/zoo/etc. just the 3 of us. I love those moments.  

2) I love having the energy and time to spend on taking care of things related to our family and house. This includes chores, cooking, random errands, etc. 

3) I love having energy and time to spend with Dave and our friends (ie. Tuesday playgroup, other playdates, date-nights, dinners, hanging out, etc.).

4) I love having the time to be able to spend on things that give me joy (ie. crafting, decorating, and organizing (yes..it gives me joy to organize)).

Things I struggle with as a SAHM cuz I gotta tell you, there are days when the STRUGGLE is REAL!  ("I'm just sayin" as one of my friends would say) Being a SAHM is the hardest job I've ever had!

1) I struggle with feeling appreciated. This is the biggest struggle of all because there are those days where all you hear are 2 little girls whining, complaining, or yelling at you. This is when it's hard to feel like all the effort, patience, and love you've poured out is appreciated by them. There's definitely no one patting me on the back saying "great job momma for handling that meltdown or tantrum with grace and love". 

2) I struggle with having patience because there are days when "I've had enough". PERIOD

3) I struggle with taking a step back and finding joy and appreciation for the little things that happen throughout the day. 

So despite my struggles..and when I take a step back to look at the bigger picture, I truly am grateful to have the opportunity to be a SAHM. It definitely is a blessing that I am able to spend this time at home with the girls. I do miss teaching and the students but in the meantime, family and being the best mom I can be for my girls and the best wife for Dave is my priority and I'm loving it!